While there hasn’t been a major study published yet on how much time students have spent online during the Covid-19 pandemic, every indication suggests that the answer is “more.” In this era of social distancing, stay-at-home orders, online schooling and the return to in-person classes, research is more important than ever—it can help teach us how to parent well in a digital era. Experience matters too, of course; what you know from observation and from your child’s personal history can provide essential context for how to apply the data.
For the past 15 years or so, as classroom teachers in the fields of law and history, teaching students at the high school, college and graduate levels, we have been researching the ways in which young people use technology. In 2008, we published a book on our findings based on interviews, focus groups and surveys that we and our fellow researchers around the world conducted called Born Digital. To share our parenting advice based on the research, we recently published The Connected Parent.
The answer these days, for most families, can’t be “don’t ever use screens.” So, it is more a matter of what you can do to make all that screen time more productive and to improve overall health, learning and well-being. Here are ten parenting ideas based on what the research tells us.
Screen time is not one-size-fits-all.
Screen time is much more about quality than it is about quantity. As our kids are Zooming and Snapchatting and Tik Toking their way through a pandemic-scarred school year, the idea that we would set sharp limits on the amount of time they are looking at devices seems a little hard to imagine too. (And are you really putting down your phone yourself? More on that in a moment.)
The research tells us that the time kids spend on devices is less important than what they do when they are connected. Of course, it is important to note that the rules for screen time in a home should vary by age. We share the view of the American Academy of Pediatrics, for instance, that very young children—say, under the age of 2—have no good reason to be exposed to screens and that there are downsides of doing so. The AAP and other researchers have found lasting negative effects of too much screen time at an early age on children’s language development, reading ability and short-term memory. The one exception we make for these little ones is for connecting with doting grandparents or other relatives on FaceTime or Zoom. On the other end of the spectrum, it’s clear that you can’t have effective screen time limits for most older teens; both research and experience shoes that they will ignore you and will simply work around your efforts to control them, undermining their trust in you and the strength of your relationship in the process.
Take data privacy seriously yourself and translate that experience into talks with your kids.
Take data privacy more seriously than you do right now. And then talk about it with your kids, ideally by the time they have reached the tween years. That’s the point at which they have likely begun to engage regularly with social media, whether on a mobile phone you’ve given them or on another device inside or outside the home. Based on the research we have done at the Youth and Media Lab at the Berkman Klein Center at Harvard University, we have seen that many regular practices can help young people develop good data privacy habits. While an increasing number of states require some form of digital literacy classes, most parents can’t rely on schools to teach the data skills and habits that young people need. These data-driven teaching tools can be accessed by anyone for free via the Youth and Media Lab website.
Young people do make mistakes when it comes to sharing too much information about themselves online. For instance, some do not think enough about the longer term consequences of sharing certain images of themselves or engaging in discussions that may involve hurtful themes for others. But the research shows they are likely to have better and more ingenious coping skills when it comes to using social media than you think. In our focus groups and interviews, we have observed students’ ability to learn and teach one another about smart ways to communicate online without creating long-term problems for themselves or their friends. It’s important that you’re on the same page, sharing tips and practices as you both navigate the new worlds of social media, gaming and just about any new data-hungry application.
Help your child develop safety skills but don’t let fear be your guide.
The reality of online safety risks is a little different than what mainstream media might have us all believe. The risk of meeting someone who will do them physical harm—any parent’s worst nightmare—is much lower today than it was 30 years ago. It is true that the places where young people can meet those who would harm them have moved, in part, from the local park to online spaces. But these spaces are more likely to be places where kids know trouble could lurk.
The more frequent harms that young people—typically in their tween and teenage years—report have to do with bullying. Bullying online is almost always connected to bullying offline. The young people most likely to be bullied offline, including LGBTQIA+ youth and those from other marginalized communities, are more likely to be bullied online. The exact prevalence of bullying on the Internet is much debated, but suffice to say that the psychological risks are real and are almost always tied to the treatment of one another in real space. It’s rarely just “cyberbullying;” the research by Data & Society’s?danah boyd, among others, shows that the term “bullying” is more apt in the sense that the psychological harm tends to cross media, time and space.
You might consider following some simple rules as a family. One is not to use online dating sites until a certain age—say, 18. And since we know that those who are bullied are more likely to bully others, make kindness an affirmative family value. Find ways to practice this value in online as well as real-space interactions of all types.
Do one thing at a time. There’s no such thing as multi-tasking.
Just do one thing at a time. Multi-tasking isn’t possible. Given that many kids grow up using devices for long periods each day, by the time they are in middle school and high school, they often think that they are able to multi-task. But no one really can, as researchers associated with the American Psychological Society and many others have shown over the years. What they are doing is switch-tasking, changing quickly between tasks. While there may be value in this kind of activity—say, for someone piloting an airplane—kids doing their homework should be focused on one thing, not trying to do several at once.
Turn off screens a half hour, or ideally an hour, before bedtime.
Kids do not get enough sleep. Sleep scientists such as Brown University’s Mary Carskadon tell us that teenagers, for instance, would ideally get nine and a quarter hours of sleep each night. One reason this is not happening is the presence of screens late in the day. An easy approach is to have a rule about turning off screens at least an hour before bedtime. If that’s not possible, then try at least half an hour.
Put all screens out of view during homework and bedtime.
As teachers, we know that learners from the very youngest ages all the way through high school are tempted when there is a screen in front of them. And if we’re honest, that is true of all of us, whether young or not. That’s no surprise: the designers of social media and online games use psychological research to ensure that their services hold our attention.
Assuming the learning isn’t happening through the device, keep all devices out of view while homework or in-person teaching is occurring. When meeting in an actual classroom, we have asked all students to turn off their phones and place them in a basket out of view. That’s obviously not possible in a virtual learning environment, but it can be a useful tip for students of all ages to set aside their phones—in a drawer or otherwise out of view—during homework time.
Kids actually do learn some things during all that gaming.
Many parents tell us they worry about the effects of online gaming on their child’s life. After all, most studies show that more than 90 percent of young people—of both genders, and spanning ages from the single digits through adolescence—are online gamers to one degree or another. And certainly, for some young people, gaming can become a time-sucking obsession that crowds out other healthy activities. But studies consistently show that fears about online gaming are wildly overblown. Little evidence exists for the frequent claim that video games make young people more aggressive or less kind to one another, a charge often leveled at this generation. The key realm where studies show there is truth to this claim is in the most violent, sexual online and gaming environments, which have been shown to lead to more aggressive sexual behavior among boys.
On the contrary, gaming can be a positive driver of learning, both in terms of cognitive and social and emotional gains for young people. One study published in the Journal of Neuroscience in 2015 by Gregory D. Clemenson and Craig E.L. Stark showed that video gamers engaged in complex three-dimensional games improved their memory in a demanding test. Computer design and programming tasks have led to a wide range of positive learning outcomes for young children using the program Scratch (an MIT Media Lab designed learning environment for ages 8 to 16) through older students carrying out more complex tasks. A study published in 2019 by Yemaya J. Halbrook and colleagues showed a range of positive social and emotional outcomes from gaming among a broad range of school-aged children, especially in terms of relations to other young people and when combined with physical activities.
Kids are big on getting engaged in civic life—and often do so through new technologies.
Some think that kids these days are apathetic when it comes to politics. Some parents worry about the rate of voting going down among young people. People often blame the idea of “clicktivism,” in which young people click “l(fā)ike” on a page and think they have done their part to improve society.
While changes have indeed occurred in how kids are acting, digital tools can be a big part of young people, especially in high school, getting involved in constructive social change. Studies have consistently shown that civic engagement broadly is up, not down—in fact, in one long-term?study by the Higher Education Research Institute at UCLA, community engagement has recently hit all-time highs. The same studies show big increases in the likelihood of involvement on the part of African American and Latino young people in high school and college. The nature of this engagement has changed a bit; kids these days are more likely to volunteer, to march in the streets (think of climate change and #BLM these days), or to start something on their own online. At the same time, they are less likely to trust and invest in institutions of the past and to participate in “dutiful” civic acts. Many of these same themes are playing out globally as well as in the United States, as UNICEF and others have?reported.
Take breaks! Jumping jacks, nature walks, device-free time…
With kids tied to their computers for fun, social engagement, homework, and often class time during the pandemic, the need to get them moving has never been higher. In between Zoom sessions, encourage them to do jumping jacks or lunges, to dance to a Bollywood video, or take a trip around the block or in the park.
It’s going to be different in every family, but device-free time is a must. Even though we started out by saying not to stress too much about the numbers involved in screen time, the importance of connecting offline and taking a break from screens is high these days. It’s also a great way to compare notes if you, too, are spending too much time online. This brings us to our last tip, perhaps the most important of all.
You need to model.
You don’t need research to prove that what you do as a parent matters to your kids. The old adage “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree” has as much to do with your children watching you as it does with genetics. Kids are watching us at all times, whether we know it or acknowledge it or not. If you are telling kids to care about your privacy but you are letting it all hang out there on your Facebook page or dating site profile, believe us, they will know it. If you are telling them to limit time on their devices and run around outside and play, you better not be on your phone playing Word Cookies as you are saying it. Nothing will matter more in terms of your ability to guide and support your kids in their digital habits than your own practices.
The bottom line from all this research: communication is pretty much a key to everything. We communicate to our kids through our actions, our willingness to listen to them, and our ability to learn and to grow. The connected parent is one to whom their kids will turn when things get tough; even if you don’t know the answer, you’ll have an entry point for conversation when it really matters. And in the really good times, and in all the times in between, you might have some fun playing online games, bonding over new apps or finding new ways to access old films together.
十個(gè)有研究支持的數(shù)字時(shí)代育兒技巧??
雖然目前還沒(méi)有一項(xiàng)關(guān)于疫情期間學(xué)生在網(wǎng)上花費(fèi)了多少時(shí)間的研究，但種種跡象表明，答案一定是 "更多"。如今，社交疏遠(yuǎn)、外賣(mài)依賴(lài)、在線教育、面授課程重新流行，這樣的研究比以往任何時(shí)候都更重要——它有助于教導(dǎo)我們?nèi)绾卧凇皵?shù)字時(shí)代”做好父母。當(dāng)然，經(jīng)驗(yàn)也很重要；觀察得到的孩子個(gè)人歷史情況，可以為如何應(yīng)用數(shù)據(jù)提供必要的背景支撐。
在過(guò)去的15年多時(shí)間里，作為法律和歷史領(lǐng)域的班主任，在高中、大學(xué)和研究生階段教授學(xué)生，我們一直在研究年輕人使用技術(shù)的方式。2008年，根據(jù)我們和世界各地的研究人員進(jìn)行的訪談、焦點(diǎn)小組和調(diào)查，我將相關(guān)研究成果出版了一本書(shū)，名為《數(shù)字人生》。為了分享我們基于研究的育兒建議，我們最近出版了《互聯(lián)父母》。
如今，對(duì)于大多數(shù)家庭來(lái)說(shuō)，答案不可能是 "永遠(yuǎn)不要使用屏幕（電子設(shè)備）"。因此，更值得關(guān)注是，可以做什么來(lái)使所有的“屏幕時(shí)間”更有效，并增強(qiáng)身體健康，學(xué)習(xí)效果和幸福感。以下是基于研究告訴我們的十個(gè)育兒理念。
屏幕時(shí)間不是一刀切的。
屏幕時(shí)間的質(zhì)量比數(shù)量重要得多。當(dāng)我們的孩子咋慕課和Snapchat和Tiktok上度過(guò)他們的疫情年，我們明確限制他們看設(shè)備的時(shí)間量的想法，似乎有點(diǎn)難以想象。(你自己真的會(huì)放下手機(jī)嗎? 稍后再談）
研究告訴我們，了解他們?cè)谶B接網(wǎng)絡(luò)時(shí)做的事情，比控制他們花在設(shè)備上的時(shí)間更重要。當(dāng)然，需要注意的是，家庭中屏幕時(shí)間的規(guī)定應(yīng)該因年齡而異。例如，我們贊同美國(guó)兒科學(xué)會(huì)的觀點(diǎn)——非常小的孩子，比如2歲以下的孩子，沒(méi)有充分的理由接觸屏幕，而且依賴(lài)電子設(shè)備也有弊端。美國(guó)兒科學(xué)會(huì)和其他研究人員發(fā)現(xiàn)，在幼年時(shí)過(guò)多的屏幕時(shí)間會(huì)對(duì)兒童的語(yǔ)言發(fā)展、閱讀能力和短期記憶產(chǎn)生持久的負(fù)面影響。我們只為這些小家伙提供一種例外情況，即通過(guò)FaceTime或Zoom與慈愛(ài)的祖父母或其他親屬聯(lián)系。在光譜的另一端（不過(guò)另一方面），對(duì)大多數(shù)年長(zhǎng)的青少年而言，你很難明確的屏幕時(shí)間限令；研究和經(jīng)驗(yàn)表明，他們只會(huì)忽略你，繞過(guò)你的努力來(lái)使用那些電子設(shè)備，這個(gè)過(guò)程會(huì)破壞孩子對(duì)你的信任和你們關(guān)系的強(qiáng)度。
自己認(rèn)真對(duì)待數(shù)據(jù)隱私，并將這種經(jīng)驗(yàn)轉(zhuǎn)化為與孩子們的談話。
要比你現(xiàn)在更認(rèn)真地對(duì)待數(shù)據(jù)隱私。然后和你的孩子們談?wù)撨@個(gè)問(wèn)題，最好是在他們已經(jīng)到了十幾歲的時(shí)候。這時(shí)他們很可能已經(jīng)開(kāi)始經(jīng)常接觸社交媒體，可能是用你給他們的手機(jī)，或是通過(guò)家庭內(nèi)外的其他設(shè)備。根據(jù)我們?cè)诠鸫髮W(xué)伯克曼-克萊因中心青年與媒體實(shí)驗(yàn)室所做的研究，我們看到很多常規(guī)的做法可以幫助年輕人養(yǎng)成良好的數(shù)據(jù)隱私習(xí)慣。雖然越來(lái)越多的州要求開(kāi)設(shè)某種形式的數(shù)字素養(yǎng)課程，但大多數(shù)家長(zhǎng)不能依靠學(xué)校來(lái)教授年輕人所需要的數(shù)據(jù)技能和習(xí)慣。這些數(shù)據(jù)驅(qū)動(dòng)型的教學(xué)手段，任何人都可以通過(guò)青年與媒體實(shí)驗(yàn)室網(wǎng)站免費(fèi)獲取。
年輕人在網(wǎng)上分享太多關(guān)于自己的信息時(shí)，確實(shí)會(huì)犯錯(cuò)誤。例如，有些人沒(méi)有充分考慮到分享自己的某些圖像、或參與可能涉及傷害他人主題的討論的長(zhǎng)期后果。但研究表明，他們?cè)谑褂蒙缃幻襟w時(shí)，很可能會(huì)有比你想象中的更好、更巧妙的應(yīng)對(duì)技巧。在我們的焦點(diǎn)小組和訪談中，我們觀察到學(xué)生們有能力學(xué)習(xí)并互相傳授有關(guān)在線交流的實(shí)用方法，并且不會(huì)給自己或朋友造成長(zhǎng)期問(wèn)題。重要的是，當(dāng)你們都在社交媒體、游戲和其他新的數(shù)據(jù)密集型應(yīng)用的新世界中航行時(shí)，你們要站在同一戰(zhàn)線上，分享技巧和實(shí)踐。
幫助孩子培養(yǎng)安全技能，但不要讓恐懼成為你的主題。
網(wǎng)上安全風(fēng)險(xiǎn)的現(xiàn)實(shí)情況，與主流媒體讓我們看到的情況有些不同。今天，遇到會(huì)對(duì)他們?cè)斐缮眢w傷害的人——這是任何父母的最可怕的噩夢(mèng)——-的風(fēng)險(xiǎn)比30年前低得多。誠(chéng)然，年輕人能夠遇到那些可能傷害自己身體的惡徒的地方，已經(jīng)從當(dāng)?shù)毓珗@轉(zhuǎn)移到了網(wǎng)絡(luò)空間。但孩子們也許已經(jīng)知道哪些是麻煩可能潛伏的地方。
年輕人——通常是在他們的十幾歲——較多的危機(jī)報(bào)告與欺凌有關(guān)。線上的欺凌幾乎都與線下的欺凌有關(guān)。最有可能在線下受到欺凌的年輕人，包括LGBTQIA+社區(qū)和來(lái)自其他邊緣化社區(qū)的年輕人，更有可能在網(wǎng)上受到欺凌。網(wǎng)絡(luò)上欺凌的確切發(fā)生率有很多爭(zhēng)議，但要知道，遭遇心理傷害的風(fēng)險(xiǎn)是真實(shí)存在的，而且?guī)缀醵寂c現(xiàn)實(shí)空間中彼此的待遇有關(guān)。它不只是 "網(wǎng)絡(luò)謾罵"，Data & Society的danah boyd等人的研究表明，"欺凌 "這個(gè)詞更貼切，因?yàn)樾睦韨ν鶗?huì)跨越媒介、時(shí)間和空間。
你可以考慮制定一個(gè)家庭需要遵循一些簡(jiǎn)單規(guī)則。例如在一定年齡之前--比如說(shuō)18歲之前，不要使用在線交友網(wǎng)站。既然我們知道那些被欺負(fù)的人更有可能欺負(fù)別人，那就把善良作為一種積極的家庭價(jià)值觀。在網(wǎng)上以及現(xiàn)實(shí)空間的各類(lèi)互動(dòng)中，想辦法踐行這一價(jià)值觀。
一次只做一件事。沒(méi)有所謂的多任務(wù)。
一次只做一件事。多任務(wù)是不可能的。鑒于很多孩子每天長(zhǎng)時(shí)間使用設(shè)備，到了初中和高中，他們往往認(rèn)為自己能夠同時(shí)間完成多任務(wù)。但沒(méi)有人真的能做到，正如美國(guó)心理學(xué)會(huì)和許多其他機(jī)構(gòu)的相關(guān)研究，他們能做的到不過(guò)是切換任務(wù)，在任務(wù)之間快速轉(zhuǎn)換。雖然這種活動(dòng)可能有價(jià)值--比如說(shuō)，對(duì)于駕駛飛機(jī)的人來(lái)說(shuō)--但做作業(yè)的孩子，更應(yīng)該專(zhuān)注于一件事，而不是試圖同時(shí)做幾件事。
在睡覺(jué)前半小時(shí)，或者最好是一小時(shí)，關(guān)掉屏幕。
孩子們沒(méi)有得到足夠的睡眠。布朗大學(xué)的瑪麗-卡斯卡頓等睡眠科學(xué)家告訴我們，以青少年為例，他們每晚最好能睡9又1/4小時(shí)。睡眠不足原因之一是，晚飯后依然在使用電子設(shè)備。一個(gè)簡(jiǎn)單的方法是，規(guī)定在睡覺(jué)前至少一個(gè)小時(shí)關(guān)閉屏幕。如果這做不到，那就試試至少半小時(shí)。
在做作業(yè)和睡覺(jué)時(shí)，把所有的屏幕都放在視野之外。
作為老師，我們知道，從幼兒一直到高中學(xué)生，當(dāng)面前有屏幕時(shí)，他們都會(huì)受到誘惑。坦白講，我們所有人都是如此，無(wú)論年輕與否。這并不奇怪：社交媒體和網(wǎng)絡(luò)游戲的設(shè)計(jì)者們，擅長(zhǎng)利用心理學(xué)研究來(lái)確保他們的服務(wù)能夠吸引我們的注意力。
假設(shè)學(xué)習(xí)無(wú)需借助電子設(shè)備，在做作業(yè)或上面授課時(shí)，要讓所有的設(shè)備都不在視野中。在現(xiàn)實(shí)中的課堂上開(kāi)會(huì)時(shí)，我們已經(jīng)要求所有學(xué)生關(guān)閉手機(jī)，并將其放在一個(gè)籃子里，不被人看到。這在虛擬學(xué)習(xí)環(huán)境中顯然是不可能的，但對(duì)于所有年齡段的學(xué)生來(lái)說(shuō)，在做家庭作業(yè)的時(shí)候把手機(jī)放在抽屜里或其他看不見(jiàn)的地方，這可能是一個(gè)有用的建議。
孩子們?cè)谶@些游戲中其實(shí)也能學(xué)到一些東西。
很多家長(zhǎng)告訴我們，他們擔(dān)心網(wǎng)絡(luò)游戲?qū)⒆由畹挠绊憽．吘?，大多?shù)研究表明，90%以上的年輕人——無(wú)論男女，年齡跨度從個(gè)位數(shù)到青春期——都或多或少地玩過(guò)網(wǎng)游。當(dāng)然，對(duì)于一些年輕人來(lái)說(shuō)，游戲可能會(huì)成為一種耗費(fèi)時(shí)間的癡迷，擠掉其他健康的活動(dòng)。但研究一致表明，對(duì)網(wǎng)游的擔(dān)心被過(guò)分夸大了。經(jīng)常有人說(shuō)，電子游戲會(huì)讓年輕人變得更有攻擊性或更不善待他人，這種說(shuō)法幾乎沒(méi)有什么證據(jù)，而這種指控經(jīng)常針對(duì)這一代人。研究表明，如果這種說(shuō)法成立，那也是在最暴力、最性感的網(wǎng)絡(luò)游戲中，這些環(huán)境已被證明會(huì)導(dǎo)致男孩更具有攻擊性的性行為。
相反，游戲可以成為學(xué)習(xí)的正向驅(qū)動(dòng)力，無(wú)論是在認(rèn)知方面，還是在年輕人的社會(huì)和情感方面都有收獲。2015年Gregory D. Clemenson和Craig E.L. Stark在《神經(jīng)科學(xué)雜志》上發(fā)表的一項(xiàng)研究表明，游戲者進(jìn)行一項(xiàng)復(fù)雜的三維視頻游戲后，在一項(xiàng)苛刻的測(cè)試中提高了他們的記憶力。計(jì)算機(jī)設(shè)計(jì)和編程任務(wù)計(jì)算機(jī)設(shè)計(jì)和編程任務(wù)已經(jīng)為使用Scratch程序（麻省理工學(xué)院媒體實(shí)驗(yàn)室為8至16歲設(shè)計(jì)的學(xué)習(xí)環(huán)境）的幼兒帶來(lái)了廣泛、積極的學(xué)習(xí)成果，而年長(zhǎng)的學(xué)生則能夠執(zhí)行更復(fù)雜的任務(wù)。Yemaya J. Halbrook及其同事在2019年發(fā)表的一項(xiàng)研究顯示，在廣大學(xué)齡兒童中，游戲帶來(lái)了一系列積極的社會(huì)和情感成果，特別是在與其他年輕人的關(guān)系上，以及游戲與體育活動(dòng)相結(jié)合時(shí)。
孩子們很喜歡參與公民生活--而且往往是通過(guò)新技術(shù)來(lái)實(shí)現(xiàn)。
有些人認(rèn)為，現(xiàn)在的孩子在政治問(wèn)題上是冷漠的。一些家長(zhǎng)擔(dān)心年輕人的投票率會(huì)下降。人們常常把責(zé)任歸咎于 "點(diǎn)擊主義 "，即年輕人在頁(yè)面上點(diǎn)擊 "喜歡"，就認(rèn)為自己為改善社會(huì)盡了一份力。
雖然孩子們的行為方式確實(shí)發(fā)生了變化，但數(shù)字工具可以成為年輕人，尤其是高中生參與建設(shè)性社會(huì)變革的重要組成部分。研究一直表明，公民參與度大體上是上升的，而不是下降的——事實(shí)上，在加州大學(xué)洛杉磯分校高等教育研究所的一項(xiàng)長(zhǎng)期研究中，社區(qū)參與度最近創(chuàng)下了歷史新高。同樣的研究顯示，非裔美國(guó)人和拉丁裔年輕人在高中和大學(xué) 的參與度大增。這種參與的性質(zhì)已經(jīng)發(fā)生了一些變化，現(xiàn)在的孩子們更有可能去做志愿者，上街游行（想想現(xiàn)在的氣候變化和#BLM運(yùn)動(dòng)），或者自己在網(wǎng)上發(fā)起一些活動(dòng)。同時(shí)，他們不太可能信任和投資過(guò)去的機(jī)構(gòu)，也不太可能參與 "盡責(zé) （表忠心）"的公民行為。正如聯(lián)合國(guó)兒童基金會(huì)和其他機(jī)構(gòu)所報(bào)道的那樣，許多同樣的主題正在全球以及美國(guó)上演。
休息一下吧！運(yùn)動(dòng)、出門(mén)散步、設(shè)置斷網(wǎng)時(shí)間.... ...
疫情期間，孩子們的娛樂(lè)、社交活動(dòng)與電腦捆綁，家庭作業(yè)和頻繁的課堂時(shí)間，讓他們聯(lián)網(wǎng)需求從未如此之高。在Zoom課程間隙，鼓勵(lì)他們做跳躍式挺舉或肺活量，隨著寶萊塢視頻跳舞，或在街區(qū)或公園里旅行。
每個(gè)家庭的情況都會(huì)不同，但無(wú)設(shè)備時(shí)間是必須的。盡管我們一開(kāi)始就說(shuō)不要太強(qiáng)調(diào)屏幕時(shí)間所涉及的數(shù)字，但現(xiàn)在線上線下的聯(lián)系和從屏幕上休息的重要性是很高的。如果你也花了太多的時(shí)間在網(wǎng)上，這也是一個(gè)比較好的方式。這讓我們想到了最后一個(gè)建議，也許是最重要的。
你需要樹(shù)立模范。
你作為父母的所作所為，對(duì)你的孩子很重要。俗話說(shuō) "蘋(píng)果不會(huì)從樹(shù)上掉下來(lái)（覆巢之下無(wú)完卵）"，這與你的孩子常常關(guān)注你有關(guān)，也與遺傳學(xué)有關(guān)。不管你是否意識(shí)到或承認(rèn)這件事，孩子們無(wú)時(shí)無(wú)刻不在注視著我們。如果你告訴孩子們要保護(hù)自己的隱私，但你卻讓個(gè)人資料全部掛在你的Facebook頁(yè)面或約會(huì)網(wǎng)站上，相信我們，他們也會(huì)知道的。如果你限制他們使用設(shè)備的時(shí)間，告訴他們多出門(mén)玩耍，你最好不要在說(shuō)這些話時(shí)在手機(jī)上玩Word Cookie。對(duì)于你引導(dǎo)和指導(dǎo)孩子們的使用數(shù)字媒介這件事而言，你自己怎么做是最重要的。
所有這些研究的底線是：溝通是一切的關(guān)鍵。真正采取行動(dòng)去與孩子們溝通，聆聽(tīng)他們的聲音，并且學(xué)習(xí)和提升溝通能力。與孩子心意相通父母，是當(dāng)孩子遇到困難時(shí)會(huì)向他們求助；即使你不知道答案，你也會(huì)在一些真正重要的時(shí)刻，有一個(gè)談話的切入點(diǎn)。在親子相處的美好時(shí)光，你們可能會(huì)玩一些在線游戲，在新的應(yīng)用程序上建立聯(lián)系，或者找到新的方式來(lái)一起觀看老電影。
The Connected Parent: An Expert Guide to Parenting in a Digital World?
John Palfrey and Urs Gasser bring together over a decade of research at Harvard to tackle parents' most urgent concerns. The Connected Parent is required reading for anyone trying to help their kids flourish in the fast-changing, uncharted territory of the digital age.
聯(lián)網(wǎng)的父母。數(shù)字化世界中的育兒專(zhuān)家指南。
約翰-帕爾弗雷和烏爾斯-加塞爾將哈佛大學(xué)十多年的研究成果匯集在一起，解決父母最迫切的問(wèn)題。對(duì)于任何試圖幫助孩子在快速變化、未知領(lǐng)域的數(shù)字時(shí)代茁壯成長(zhǎng)的人來(lái)說(shuō)，《互聯(lián)父母》都是必讀之作。
