多個內(nèi)容同時放在一個句子中表達因為英語具備句尾開放性,英語的句子一般較漢語長(陳宏薇 2004)。即便如此,一般知名度高的科研期刊并不歡迎包含很多復(fù)雜長句的稿件,因為科研論文的主要宗旨是清楚明白地傳遞科研信息,使讀者快速高效獲取科研資訊。因此,寫作時要盡量避免用一個句子表達多層意思,或一次表述多件事物(魏爾清 2009)。
例12
誤例:MPM hasmultiple advantages: it eliminates the possibility of damaging the skin whencompared with WCM, and it's a more simple technological flow compared with HuHuaxin’s method; it is a technology that is safe andeasy to perform; as indicated by the quality control test, accurate results canbe obtained via different personnel after a short training period.
改為:MPM hasmultiple advantages. It eliminates the possibility of damaging the skin whencompared with WCM. Also, it's a more simple technological flow compared with HuHuaxin's method. Furthermore, it is a technology that is safe and easy toperform. Lastly, as indicated by the quality control test, accurate results canbe obtained via different personnel after a short training period.
例12 中的誤例十分冗長,給閱讀帶來了較重的負擔。修改后的句子將原句拆分為了五個小句,并適當添加連接用語明確各句之間的邏輯關(guān)系,更加清楚、自然、易于閱讀。一個內(nèi)容嵌套在另一個內(nèi)容中表達使讀者更難理解的是在同一個句子中,一件事物中隱含著另一件事物(魏爾清 2009)。這需要讀者花更多的時間來理清不同事物間的邏輯關(guān)系。
例13
誤例:A sampleof 10 healthy women who were exclusively breastfeeding their babies (age 8~23weeks old) was studied.
改為:A sampleof 10 healthy women was studied. All subjects were exclusively breastfeedingtheir babies (age 8~23 weeks old).
例14
誤例:We beganby performing needs analysis of some visiting scholars who returned from theWestern countries in the affiliated hospitals of our university to identifytheir major needs.
改為 :We beganby performing needs analysis. We interviewed some visiting scholars who work inthe affiliated hospitals of our university and returned from the west toidentify their major needs.
修改后的兩個句子把隱含在另一件事物中的內(nèi)容抽提出來單獨成句,易于讀者理解。
如何判斷一個句子是否是長句?實際上,通過句子的長度可以辨識句子是不是長句——超過60個單詞就是長句。但是,一個句子如果表述的內(nèi)容過多從而使得論點變得不清晰,即使沒有那么多單詞它也是長句。通過限定每一個句子只說明一到兩個話題,可以避免文章出現(xiàn)過長的句子,注意which, that的用法,若容易產(chǎn)生誤解,請另起一段??傊?,我們要盡量讓句子簡潔明了,意思清晰。加QQ:3398234353,體驗下SPE學(xué)術(shù)翻譯的語言功底吧~