What are some of the first things you do in the morning?
你晨起后的第一件事是什么？
I woke up this morning, like I do every morning, at 4am.
我今天早上也像平時一樣，4點就起床。
This is what I look like at 4:00 am. I am clearly not a morning person.
這就是我那時的樣子。很顯然我不是一名晨型人類。
I’m tired, I’m cold, I’m pissed off and just generally not to be fu#*ed with.
我很累、很冷、心里超不爽但也沒啥脾氣。
You’re probably thinking, “Wow, you must have to go to work REALLY early.”
你可能會想，“哇，你一定是要上非常早的班吧?！?/p>
Well, you’re wrong. I choose to do this…
好吧，你錯了。我是自愿這么做的……
Why?
為啥呢？
Because, despite looking & feeling like a turd that was assaulted with pepper spray, this is when I get the most sh*t done.
因為，我那時除了看上去像坨屎或可能因此被人誤認為是壞蜀黍而噴胡椒粉外，我真的能在早上就干完大部分的事情。
You see, there is an art to starting yourself up at 4am when you’re not a morning person. It’s a lot like starting up a crappy car in cold weather or starting a fire by rubbing two sticks together.
你看，這就是一門藝術(shù)：將不是晨型人的自己在早上4點叫起。感覺就像是在一個很冷的早上發(fā)動一輛古怪的汽車、或者像用兩根棍子摩擦生火一樣。
It’s methodical.
這是有方法可循的。
It’s frustrating.
這是讓人抓狂的。
It takes many tries to get it right.
你要嘗試很多次才能抓住要領(lǐng)。
It is The Art of the Routine.
這是作息規(guī)律的藝術(shù)。
Here is mine:
我是這么安排的：
4:00 am: Wake up, put on a ridiculous oversized hoodie.
4:00：起床，穿上大號滑稽的套頭衫。
4:00 - 4:05 am: Stumble to the coffee maker, start making coffee (light roast, I hear it has more caffeine).
4:00 - 4:05：掙扎著走到咖啡機旁邊，開始做咖啡（輕烤，我聽說這會讓咖啡具有更多的咖啡因）
4:05 - 4:15 am: Stretch, listen to my body make assorted cracking sounds, maybe fart once or twice.
4:05 - 4:15：拉伸，聽自己的身體發(fā)出稀奇古怪的聲音，也許放一兩次屁屁。
4:15 - 5:00 am: Write. This is where the magic happens. I get more high-quality writing done in this 45-minute window than I would in 3 hours at night. No joke.
4:15-5:00：寫作。這就是見證奇跡的時刻了。我在這45分鐘會寫出高質(zhì)量的文字。而這些讓我在晚上就是花3個小時也不可能寫的出來。真不是開玩笑。
So, by this point, I’m all wired from the coffee and creative energy. This is what I look like now:
所以，就這一點看，我就是咖啡和創(chuàng)造力的奴隸。這是我現(xiàn)在看起來的樣子。
No bueno. Need to chill out.
哎呀，不妙。需要冷靜下了。
5:00 to 5:15 am: Meditate. It looks like I’m just twitching on a cushion but trust me, I’m actually in a deep state of tranquility and inner peace. This gets me mentally prepared for my next task…
5:00 to 5:15：冥想。我看起來像在墊子上抽搐，但是信我，哥其實正處在深層次地平靜和內(nèi)心的寧靜中。這將使我為接下來的工作儲備精神上的能量。
5:15 to 5:50 am: Answer emails and clear my inbox. FML.
5:15 to 5:50：回郵件、清理郵箱。（FML的意思是Fuck My Life，翻譯成中文就是我*蛋的人生）
5:50 to 7:00 am: Go to Crossfit, unleash the inner beast (thinking about emails and scheduling for rage-based-motivation).
5:50 to 7:00：去Crossfit健身房，釋放內(nèi)心的野獸（想想郵件、忍住體內(nèi)的洪荒之力來做計劃）
7:00 to 8:00 am: Cold Shower (best body hack ever), breakfast (usually oatmeal and a protein shake) and head to the office. At this point the 30-minute, steamy, hellish morning commute on public transit doesn’t even phase me.
7:00-8:00：冷水澡（身體最佳黑客）、早餐（通常情況下是燕麥片和蛋白質(zhì)奶昔），然后前往公司。這時的30分鐘，是在潮濕如地獄般的早高峰通勤中完成的，但是并不會擊垮我。
By the time I’m at work, I look happier thana hammer in a nail factory(pretty sure that’s an expression) and I’m ready to crush the day.
（標藍的部分，來自一個流行語：I'd rather be a Hammer than a Nail...我寧愿當個錘子，也不要像釘子一樣被人隨意捶打。）
當我開始公司的工作時，我看起來像打了雞血一樣（很確定的是，那就是個表情）我已經(jīng)做好準備來迎戰(zhàn)新的一天。
** UPDATE: A lot of people have been asking me what time I go to sleep (understandably so). 9:00 to 9:30 pm works well for me but your mileage will vary.
更新：很多人問我什么時候上床睡覺（也是能理解）。我一般是9:00-9:30，但是你可以制定自己的作息計劃。
Also, WOW, the response to this is unbelievable, 1.2K upvotes and counting! You guys rock!
我去，對于這個回答的反饋太難以置信了，1200的贊，你們太贊了！
If I had known this many people would read this answer I might have left out the yoga-fart bit. Oh well. **
如果我知道會有這么多人閱讀這個回答，我可能會把瑜伽時放屁屁的部分給略過的。好吧……
安娜譯
