當(dāng)孩子做事拖拉，作業(yè)不會(huì)，陷入沮喪情緒，當(dāng)爸媽的記得一定不要發(fā)怒，calm down保持冷靜是第一要?jiǎng)?wù)，之后你可以進(jìn)行下面的動(dòng)作：

1. Take a few deep breaths and/or count silently to 10 if you’re feeling upset.

深呼吸，或者從心里數(shù)到10。

2. Look at your child and pay attention to any emotional cues including body language, tone of voice, and words if they’re using them.

認(rèn)真看著孩子，觀察他們?cè)谟檬裁辞榫w表達(dá)？例如身體語言，聲調(diào)語氣，說出什么樣的話。

3. Calmly validate their feelings by saying, “I see you’re (angry, mad, upset, disappointed, sad, etc.)”

冷靜地確認(rèn)孩子現(xiàn)在的情緒，告訴ta"我知道你生氣了，氣瘋了，很煩，很失望，很傷心……"

4. Next, try to understand why they’re upset. If you’re not sure you might say, “Tell me what is making you …?” If they can’t tell you, state your observation by saying, “It looks to me like you are ___ because of ___? I understand how that could ___.

下面，試著弄清楚他們不開心的原因。如果不確定的話，你可以說：“跟我說說你為啥這么……呢？”如果他們說不清楚，請(qǐng)陳述下你的觀察，“我覺得你好像因?yàn)椤?，我知道那?huì)讓你……”

5. With younger children, this may be the time to say, “I’m sorry you are ___” and then redirect by saying, “Oh look at ____. I bet you can ____ with it.”

對(duì)待更加幼小的寶寶，例如三四五歲，或許你應(yīng)該安撫說：“看著你……我也很難過” 然后分散注意力，“瞧瞧這個(gè)……我猜你肯定能……”

6. For older children, you may have to be assertive and say, I know that is making you feel ___ but ___ (explain or state the reason their desire is not realistic).

對(duì)待大兒童，你應(yīng)該更加獨(dú)斷利落些，“我知道那讓你感覺……但是（解釋或陳述他們的想法為啥是不現(xiàn)實(shí)的）”

7. In some cases, problem-solving may be an appropriate approach.

直接解決問題或許是一個(gè)合理的辦法。

8. Taking time to teach basic coping skills for toddlers and older children is definitely in order.

孩子蹣跚學(xué)步的時(shí)候就教給基本的處理方法，他們長(zhǎng)大后肯定自有辦法。