Step One 詞匯：
（1）innocence ?n.天真，單純
innocence ends when one is stripped of the delusion that one likes oneself.
（2）I marvel that a mind on the outs with itself should have nonetheless made painstaking record of its every tremor.
on the outs with : 與某人不和
painstaking： adj. very careful and thorough 小心的；費盡心機的；精心的 （一般用于名詞前）
tremor：n. a slight shaking movement in your body that you cannot control ,especially because you are ill,weak,or upset
（3）I recall with embarrassing clarity the flavor of those particular ashes.
clarity n. the quality of being clear and easy to see or hear ?清晰，清楚
with embarrassing clarity 是插入語
（4）scarcely ?adv. almost not or almost none at all 幾乎不，幾乎沒有
同義詞：hardly
This failure could scarcely have been more predictable or less ambiguous (I simply did not have the grades)
could/can scarecely do sth
it was getting dark and she could scarcely see in front of her.
（5）unnerve v.使恐懼，使喪失信心
he was unnerved by the way Sylvia kept staring at him.
（6）I had somehow thought myself a kind of academic Raskolnikov, curiously exempt from the cause-effect relationships which hampered others.
exempt ?adj. 被免除（義務）的，被豁免的
curiously ?adv.strangely or unusually or oddly or peculiarly
hamper v. to make it difficult for someone to do sth ?妨礙；阻礙；牽制
An attempt to rescue the men has been hampered by the bad weather.
（7）conviction n. ? a very strong belief or opinion 堅定的信仰
The Dotens have a deep conviction that marriage is for life.
（8）To such doubtful amulets had my self-respect been pinned, and I faced myself that day with the nonplussed apprehension of someone who has come across a vampire and has no crucifix at hand.
amulet n. a small piece of jewellery worn to protect against bad luck,disease 護身符
amulet 與 句尾的 crucifix 十字架 ?相呼應
nonplussed adj. so surprised by sth that you do not know what to say or do 驚訝不已的;不知所措的（不用于名詞前）
apprehension ?n. 憂慮，擔心 ? anxiety
（9）Although to be driven back upon oneself is an uneasy affair at best, rather like trying to
cross a border with borrowed credentials, it seems to me now the one condition necessary
to the beginnings of real self-respect.
drive back ?擊退
at best ? under the best of conditions
credential ?n. a document attesting to the truth of certain stated facts 資格，資歷；國書
（10）Most of our platitudes notwithstanding, selfdeception remains the most difficult deception.
platitude n.老生常談，陳詞濫調（含貶義） ?a statement that has been made many times before
notwithstanding prep&adv in spite of sth 盡管
（11）The tricks that work on others count for nothing in that well-lit back alley where one keeps assignations with oneself
count for nothing 毫無價值
well-lit 采光好的，明亮的
back-alley ?窮街陋巷
（12）One shuffles flashily but in vain through one’s marked cards.
shuffle v.洗牌 ?
（13）dismal ?adj. ?a situation so bad that it makes you feel very unhappy and hopeless凄涼的，陰沉的
The future looks pretty dismal right now.
a dismal,grey afternoon.
（14）interminable ?adj. very long and boring
同義詞：endless
interminable delays
（15）splice v. to join the ends of two pieces of rope, film 連接，接合
with fresh footage spliced in for every screening.
（16）sins of commission and omission 來自于圣經(jīng) 指犯的罪和因疏忽導致的罪責
（17）the gifts irrevocably wasted through sloth or cowardice
irrevocably :adj. an action cannot be changed or stopped 不可更改的，不可撤回的（決定或行動）
sloth:n.laziness 懶惰；樹懶
cowardice:n.lack of courage 膽??；怯懦 ?
來源于： coward 膽小鬼
反義詞：bravery
（18）seem to sleep easily enough is to miss the point entirely, as surely as those people miss it who think that self-respect has necessarily to do with not having safety pins in one’s underwear.
miss the point ?不得要領
as surely as 正如...，就像...
has necessarily to do with ?與...有必然的關系
safety pins in one’s underwear 內衣上的安全別針
（19）superstition n.迷信
（20）charm n.魔力
self-respect is a kind of charm against snack.
（21）ambivalent adj. （心情）矛盾的
ambivalent conversations
（21）With that genius for accommodation more often seen in women than men, Jordan took her own measure, made her own peace, avoided threats to that peace.
accommodation ?n. 住處，住宿；和解
（22）If they choose to commit adultery, they do not then go running, in an excess of bad conscience, to receive absolution from the wronged parties; nor do they complain unduly of the unfairness, the undeserved embarrassment, of being named co-respondent.
adultery ?n.通奸
in an excess of ?過剩的
absolution n. 寬恕，赦罪
wronged adj. 被冤枉的
unduly adv. 過度地，過分的
co-respondent n.共同被告
（23）In brief, people with self-respect exhibit a certain toughness, a kind of moral nerve.
nerve n.勇氣
（24）sometimes loses ground to other, more instantly negotiable virtues.
lose ground to ?輸給...
（25）instill v.逐漸灌輸、培養(yǎng)[思想、行為方式]
instill confidence/fear/discipline ?into sb
（26）intangible adj. 難以描繪的[特質或感受]；無形的[商業(yè)中]
eg1. the island has an intangible quality of holiness.
eg2. intangible assets
（27）untenable adj.[局面]難以維持的;[論點]站不住腳的
the scandal put the President in an untenable position.
our self-image is untenable.
（28）We flatter ourselves by thinking this compulsion to please others an attractive trait: a gift for imaginative empathy, evidence of our willingness to give.
flatter yourself 自以為，自信
compulsion ?n.[難以克制的]強烈欲望，沖動
empathy n. 同情，同感
（29）At the mercy of those we cannot but hold in contempt, we play roles doomed to failure before they are begun, each defeat generating fresh despair at the urgency of divining and meeting the next demand made upon us.
at the mercy of ?任憑某人/某物擺布[而無力保護自己]
hold in contempt ?認為...不屑一顧
contempt n.輕蔑，輕視
doomed to failure ?注定失敗的
divine v. to discover or guess sth
（30）alien ?to ?不相容
alienation n. 疏遠，離間
alienation from self
（31）self-reproach n. 自責，內疚
（32）the final turn of ?screw ? ? ?
screw n.螺絲 v.擰螺絲
（33）out of question ?毫無疑問
out of the question ?絕無可能
（34）spring from sth 由...引起的
behavior which springs from prejudices ?由偏見而產(chǎn)生的行為
character is the source from which self-respect springs.
step two 思維導圖
step three 總結
這是一篇很難懂的文章。作者從自己的一次失敗講起，談了自己過去和現(xiàn)在對自尊的不同認識。同時也說了真正的自尊能給我們帶來什么，以及自尊是怎樣形成的。
在這一篇文章的學習過程中我知道了兩種做思維導圖的方法：以主題為中心和以行文思路為中心。
同時由于作者善于用典，我也了解了不少新知識，知道了要了解西方文化，圣經(jīng)必不可少。
其次，這篇文章屬于哲學散文，其思辨過程及敘述方式值得學習。
最后，這篇文章對我的改變。簡單說，自尊存在于任何愿意為自己的行為負責的人當中，要敢于面對自己的不足和失敗，不活在外界對自己的評價中，活出最真實的自己，才是真正的自尊。
