大家好，我給大家介紹一下我的媽媽?zhuān)瑖?guó)家一級(jí)抬杠選手，打我不講道理全球代言人，進(jìn)屋不敲門(mén)創(chuàng)始人。

Hello, I'd like to introduce my mother to you.She is a national champion of wrangling, the global spokesperson for beating me unreasonable and the founder of entering the room without knocking.

減肥這個(gè)事兒吧，就是3天打魚(yú)，362天曬網(wǎng)。

Losing weight means fishing for 3 days and drying the net for 362 days.

煩躁的心情就像用十除以三得出的結(jié)果，無(wú)窮無(wú)盡。

Irritable mood is like the result of dividing tenby three, endless.

每次我向我閨蜜抱怨人生的不如意和煩惱時(shí)，她都會(huì)語(yǔ)重心長(zhǎng)地說(shuō)：哈哈哈哈哈哈……

Every time I complain to my best friend aboutmy life's unhappiness and troubles, shealways says: ha ha ha……

其實(shí)，我和我的閨蜜1000年前就認(rèn)識(shí)了，那時(shí)候她比現(xiàn)在可愛(ài)，滿大街的追我，那個(gè)時(shí)候我還叫呂洞賓。

In fact, my best friend and I knew each other 1000 years ago. At that time, she was more lovely than now and chased me all over the street, then my name was LV Dongbin.

大晚上，還能看到街上很多外賣(mài)小哥奔波送餐，突然感到很勵(lì)志，別人這么晚了都還在吃，我又有什么理由不吃。

In the evening, I can see a lot of takeout boys on the street, and I suddenly feel inspired, other people are still eating at such a late hour, and I have no reason not to eat.

你要說(shuō)我嫁不出去，我根本就無(wú)所謂。但你要跟我說(shuō)我發(fā)不了財(cái)，我能愁得幾宿都不能睡。

I don't care if you say I can't get married, but I can't sleep for a few days if you have to tell me I can't make a fortune.

這兩天我總結(jié)了一下近年來(lái)獲得的成功，主要分為三類(lèi)，登錄成功，下載成功，付款成功。

In the past two days, I have summed up thesuccess achieved in recent years, which canbe divided into three categories,login successful, download successful, payment successful.

本文由“串場(chǎng)鹿鳴”發(fā)布，2021年9月3日