Ⅱ 列王的紛爭(zhēng) Chapter52 珊莎
SANSA
南方的天空濃煙密布。烏黑的煙柱從遠(yuǎn)方成百火堆中盤旋升起，黑色的手指掩蓋星辰。黑水河對(duì)岸，火焰占滿地平線，徹夜燃燒，而在這一邊，小惡魔點(diǎn)燃整個(gè)河濱地區(qū)：碼頭和倉(cāng)庫(kù)，民宅和妓院，城墻外的一切統(tǒng)統(tǒng)焚毀。
The southern sky was black with smoke. It rose swirling off a hundred distant fires, its sooty fingers smudging out the stars. Across the Blackwater Rush, a line of flame burned nightly from horizon to horizon, while on this side the Imp had fired the whole riverfront: docks and warehouses, homes and brothels, everything outside the city walls.
即使身處紅堡，空氣中也有灰燼的味道。當(dāng)珊莎在寧?kù)o的神木林里找到唐托斯爵士時(shí)，他看到她的紅眼睛，便問(wèn)她是否哭過(guò)?！爸皇菬焿m的關(guān)系，”她撒謊，“似乎半個(gè)御林都在燃燒?！?/p>
Even in the Red Keep, the air tasted of ashes. When Sansa found Ser Dontos in the quiet of the godswood, he asked if she’d been crying. “It’s only from the smoke,” she lied. “It looks as though half the kingswood is burning.”
“史坦尼斯公爵想把小惡魔的野人熏出森林?！碧仆兴拐f(shuō)話時(shí)搖搖晃晃，一手扶住栗樹樹干，紅黃相間的小丑裝上沾染一片酒漬?！八麄儦⑺浪某夂?，襲擊他的輜重車隊(duì)，還到處放火。我聽(tīng)小惡魔對(duì)太后說(shuō)，史坦尼斯得訓(xùn)練他的馬兒吃灰燼，因?yàn)樗麑⒄也坏揭黄~子。以前身為騎士，聽(tīng)不到這許多事，如今成了弄臣，他們卻對(duì)我視若無(wú)睹，談話時(shí)當(dāng)我不存在。我告訴您——”他俯身靠近，酒氣直噴到她臉上“——八爪蜘蛛花錢收買一切瑣碎消息，我想月童已為他服務(wù)好多年了?！?/p>
“Lord Stannis wants to smoke out the Imp’s savages.” Dontos swayed as he spoke, one hand on the trunk of a chestnut tree. A wine stain discolored the red-and-yellow motley of his tunic. “They kill his scouts and raid his baggage train. And the wildlings have been lighting fires too. The Imp told the queen that Stannis had better train his horses to eat ash, since he would find no blade of grass. I heard him say so. I hear all sorts of things as a fool that I never heard when I was a knight. They talk as though I am not there, and”—he leaned close, breathing his winey breath right in her face—“the Spider pays in gold for any little trifle. I think Moon Boy has been his for years.”
他又喝醉了。他自稱可憐的佛羅理安，果真名副其實(shí)。但現(xiàn)在我只能指望他?！笆诽鼓崴构粽娴臒孙L(fēng)息堡的神木林？”
He is drunk again. My poor Florian he names himself, and so he is. But he is all I have. “Is it true Lord Stannis burned the godswood at Storm’s End?”
唐托斯點(diǎn)頭?！八麑淠痉e成一個(gè)巨大的柴堆，奉獻(xiàn)給他的新神，紅袍女祭司要他這么做的。聽(tīng)說(shuō)他現(xiàn)在靈肉都?xì)w她驅(qū)使，甚至發(fā)誓一但奪取君臨，便要焚毀貝勒大圣堂呢！”
Dontos nodded. “He made a great pyre of the trees as an offering to his new god. The red priestess made him do it. They say she rules him now, body and soul. He’s vowed to burn the Great Sept of Baelor too, if he takes the city.”
“燒就燒吧?！鄙荷醮我?jiàn)到大圣堂的大理石墻和七座水晶塔時(shí)，真以為這是世上最美的建筑，但自喬佛里在圣堂講壇上將父親斬首后，她對(duì)之則是滿心厭惡?！盁蓛糇詈?。”
“Let him.” When Sansa had first beheld the Great Sept with its marble walls and seven crystal towers, she’d thought it was the most beautiful building in the world, but that had been before Joffrey beheaded her father on its steps. “I want it burned.”
“噓，孩子，諸神會(huì)聽(tīng)見(jiàn)的?！?/p>
“Hush, child, the gods will hear you.”
“怎么會(huì)？他們從不聽(tīng)我祈禱?！?/p>
“Why should they? They never hear my prayers.”
“他們?cè)诼?tīng)，所以才派我來(lái)，不是嗎？”
“Yes they do. They sent me to you, didn’t they?”
珊莎用手摳摳樹皮，覺(jué)得自己頭暈眼花，似乎有點(diǎn)發(fā)燒?！熬退闼麄兣赡銇?lái)，又有什么用呢？你答應(yīng)帶我回家，可我一直走不了?！?/p>
Sansa picked at the bark of a tree. She felt light-headed, almost feverish. “They sent you, but what good have you done? You promised you would take me home, but I’m still here.”
唐托斯拍拍她手臂?！拔腋硞€(gè)人談過(guò)了，他是我的好朋友……也是您的朋友，小姐。等時(shí)機(jī)一到，他便會(huì)雇艘快船，送我們?nèi)グ踩牡胤??！?/p>
Dontos patted her arm. “I’ve spoken to a certain man I know, a good friend to me … and you, my lady. He will hire a swift ship to take us to safety, when the time is right.”
“現(xiàn)在正是時(shí)機(jī)，”珊莎堅(jiān)持，“現(xiàn)在開戰(zhàn)在即，沒(méi)人會(huì)注意我。我想我們只要行動(dòng)，就一定能溜出去?！?/p>
“The time is right now,” Sansa insisted, “before the fighting starts. They’ve forgotten about me. I know we could slip away if we tried.”
“孩子呀，孩子。”唐托斯搖搖頭?！傲锍黾t堡很簡(jiǎn)單，我們能做到。但每道城門都戒備森嚴(yán)，何況小惡魔還封鎖了河道?！?/p>
“Child, child.” Dontos shook his head. “Out of the castle, yes, we could do that, but the city gates are more heavily guarded than ever, and the Imp has even closed off the river.”
這是事實(shí)。如今黑水河比以往任何時(shí)候都空曠。所有渡船都撤到北岸，而商船要么逃走，要么被小惡魔扣留，用于作戰(zhàn)。放眼望去，唯一的船是國(guó)王的戰(zhàn)艦。它們不斷來(lái)回穿梭，保持在河中央的深水區(qū)，與南岸史坦尼斯的弓手飛箭往來(lái)。
It was true. The Blackwater Rush was as empty as Sansa had ever seen it. All the ferries had been withdrawn to the north bank, and the trading galleys had fled or been seized by the Imp to be made over for battle. The only ships to be seen were the king’s war galleys. They rowed endlessly up and down, staying to the deep water in the middle of the river and exchanging flights of arrows with Stannis’s archers on the south shore.
史坦尼斯公爵本人還在行軍，但他的先鋒部隊(duì)已于兩天前趁一個(gè)月黑風(fēng)高的晚上先行抵達(dá)。早上醒來(lái)，全君臨都看到了他們的帳篷與旗幟。珊莎聽(tīng)說(shuō)他們有五千人之多，幾乎相當(dāng)于城里金袍衛(wèi)士的總數(shù)。敵人營(yíng)地里飄揚(yáng)著佛索威家族的青蘋果旗和紅蘋果旗，伊斯蒙家族的海龜旗以及佛羅倫家族的狐貍鮮花旗，他們的指揮官是古德·莫里根爵士，一個(gè)著名的南方騎士，從前是藍(lán)禮的綠衣衛(wèi)。他的旗幟乃是一只飛鴉，在風(fēng)雨欲來(lái)的碧綠天空中大展黑翅。但最令整個(gè)城市揪心的還是那些淡黃的旗，長(zhǎng)長(zhǎng)的旗穗拖在后面，如火焰一樣搖曳，原本該是家族紋章的地方放著神的標(biāo)記：光之王的烈焰紅心。
Lord Stannis himself was still on the march, but his vanguard had appeared two nights ago during the black of the moon. King’s Landing had woken to the sight of their tents and banners. They were five thousand, Sansa had heard, near as many as all the gold cloaks in the city. They flew the red or green apples of House Fossoway, the turtle of Estermont, and the fox-and-flowers of Florent, and their commander was Ser Guyard Morrigen, a famous southron knight who men now called Guyard the Green. His standard showed a crow in flight, its black wings spread wide against a storm-green sky. But it was the pale yellow banners that worried the city. Long ragged tails streamed behind them like flickering flames, and in place of a lord’s sigil they bore the device of a god: the burning heart of the Lord of Light.
“大家都說(shuō)，等史坦尼斯親臨城下，他的人馬將達(dá)到喬佛里的十倍?！?/p>
“When Stannis comes, he’ll have ten times as many men as Joffrey does, everyone says so.”
唐托斯捏捏她肩膀?！坝H愛(ài)的，兵力多寡并不重要，他們?cè)诖蠛訉?duì)岸，沒(méi)有船過(guò)不來(lái)。”
Dontos squeezed her shoulder. “The size of his host does not matter, sweetling, so long as they are on the wrong side of the river. Stannis cannot cross without ships.”
“可他有船，而且比喬佛里的多?！?/p>
“He has ships. More than Joffrey.”
“風(fēng)息堡到這兒路程遙遠(yuǎn)，艦隊(duì)需經(jīng)馬賽岬，穿過(guò)喉道，進(jìn)入黑水灣?；蛟S正道諸神會(huì)卷起風(fēng)暴，把他們統(tǒng)統(tǒng)抹去?！碧仆兴钩錆M希望地微笑?！拔抑滥懿蝗菀?，但是孩子，千萬(wàn)得耐心。等我的朋友回到都城，我們就會(huì)有船。您不要怕，請(qǐng)相信您的佛羅理安吧?！?/p>
“It’s a long sail from Storm’s End, the fleet will need to come up Massey’s Hook and through the Gullet and across Blackwater Bay. Perhaps the good gods will send a storm to sweep them from the seas.” Dontos gave a hopeful smile. “It is not easy for you, I know. You must be patient, child. When my friend returns to the city, we shall have our ship. Have faith in your Florian, and try not to be afraid.”
珊莎的指甲深深掐進(jìn)掌心，肚子里則有恐懼絞動(dòng)抽搐，一天比一天強(qiáng)烈。彌賽菈公主離去那天的經(jīng)歷一直在夢(mèng)中糾纏不休，夢(mèng)魘黑暗而令人窒息，令她每每在深晚驚醒，拼命喘氣。群眾的尖叫縈繞耳際，不成詞句，活像動(dòng)物的嘶喊。他們把她團(tuán)團(tuán)圍住，各種東西朝她扔來(lái)，還想將她拉下馬，若不是獵狗殺開一條血路來(lái)救她，后果不堪設(shè)想。想想看，他們將總主教撕成碎片，用石頭砸扁了艾倫爵士的頭。您不要怕！他居然要我別害怕！
Sansa dug her nails into her hand. She could feel the fear in her tummy, twisting and pinching, worse every day. Nightmares of the day Princess Myrcella had sailed still troubled her sleep; dark suffocating dreams that woke her in the black of night, struggling for breath. She could hear the people screaming at her, screaming without words, like animals. They had hemmed her in and thrown filth at her and tried to pull her off her horse, and would have done worse if the Hound had not cut his way to her side. They had torn the High Septon to pieces and smashed in Ser Aron’s head with a rock. Try not to be afraid! he said.
其實(shí)全城都陷入了恐慌。珊莎在城堡圍墻上看到，老百姓們統(tǒng)統(tǒng)關(guān)閉窗戶，上好門閂，似乎這樣就能保住性命。上次君臨城陷，蘭尼斯特家肆意奸淫擄掠，帶走幾百條人命，那一次還是開城投降的。而今小惡魔意圖抵抗，城破之后的下場(chǎng)可想而知。
The whole city was afraid. Sansa could see it from the castle walls. The smallfolk were hiding themselves behind closed shutters and barred doors as if that would keep them safe. The last time King’s Landing had fallen, the Lannisters looted and raped as they pleased and put hundreds to the sword, even though the city had opened its gates. This time the Imp meant to fight, and a city that fought could expect no mercy at all.
唐托斯還在喋喋不休。“如果我還是騎士，就得穿上盔甲，和其他人一起守城。我真該親吻喬佛里國(guó)王的腳，真心實(shí)意地感謝他的安排。”
Dontos was prattling on. “If I were still a knight, I should have to put on armor and man the walls with the rest. I ought to kiss King Joffrey’s feet and thank him sweetly.”
“你去謝他把你變成弄臣，他就會(huì)讓你再做回騎士，”珊莎尖刻地說(shuō)。
“If you thanked him for making you a fool, he’d make you a knight again,” Sansa said sharply.
唐托斯咯咯笑道：“我的瓊琪是個(gè)聰明姑娘，不是嗎？”
Dontos chuckled. “My Jonquil’s a clever girl, isn’t she?”
“喬佛里和他母親說(shuō)我很笨?！?/p>
“Joffrey and his mother say I’m stupid.”
“他們這樣想就好，親愛(ài)的，這樣您更安全。瑟曦太后，小惡魔以及瓦里斯這些人當(dāng)彼此是毒蛇猛獸，像老鷹一樣互相盯得緊緊的，到處花錢雇人探聽(tīng)消息，但坦妲伯爵夫人的女兒就沒(méi)人勞神關(guān)心，對(duì)不對(duì)？”唐托斯捂住嘴巴，打了個(gè)嗝?！爸T神保佑您，我的小瓊琪?！彼臏I水涌上來(lái)，是酒的緣故。“快給您的佛羅理安一個(gè)小小的吻吧。一個(gè)幸運(yùn)之吻?！彼麚u搖晃晃地向她靠近。
“Let them. You’re safer that way, sweetling. Queen Cersei and the Imp and Lord Varys and their like, they all watch each other keen as hawks, and pay this one and that one to spy out what the others are doing, but no one ever troubles themselves about Lady Tanda’s daughter, do they?” Dontos covered his mouth to stifle a burp. “Gods preserve you, my little Jonquil.” He was growing weepy. The wine did that to him. “Give your Florian a little kiss now. A kiss for luck.” He swayed toward her.
珊莎避開他探出的濕潤(rùn)雙唇，輕輕吻在他胡子拉碴的臉頰上，并跟他道晚安，竭盡全力才沒(méi)有哭泣。最近她哭得太多。這樣很不體面，她知道，但就是控制不住。有時(shí)為了一些瑣事，眼淚便掉下來(lái)，怎么都收不住。
Sansa dodged the wet groping lips, kissed him lightly on an unshaven cheek, and bid him good night. It took all her strength not to weep. She had been weeping too much of late. It was unseemly, she knew, but she could not seem to help herself; the tears would come, sometimes over a trifle, and nothing she did could hold them back.
梅葛樓的吊橋無(wú)人看守。小惡魔將大部分金袍衛(wèi)士調(diào)去守城，而白袍的御林鐵衛(wèi)們而今也忙得不可開交，無(wú)暇步步尾隨她。只要?jiǎng)e離開城堡，珊莎想去哪兒就可以去哪兒，但她哪兒也不想去。
The drawbridge to Maegor’s Holdfast was unguarded. The Imp had moved most of the gold cloaks to the city walls, and the white knights of the Kingsguard had duties more important than dogging her heels. Sansa could go where she would so long as she did not try to leave the castle, but there was nowhere she wanted to go.
她穿過(guò)布滿尖銳鐵刺的干涸護(hù)城河，走上狹窄的高架樓梯，當(dāng)?shù)竭_(dá)臥房門口時(shí)，居然不想進(jìn)去。房間的墻壁讓她窒息，明知里面窗戶大開，她仍然感覺(jué)空氣稀薄。
She crossed over the dry moat with its cruel iron spikes and made her way up the narrow turnpike stair, but when she reached the door of her bedchamber she could not bear to enter. The very walls of the room made her feel trapped; even with the window opened wide it felt as though there were no air to breathe.
于是珊莎轉(zhuǎn)回樓梯，繼續(xù)攀登。濃煙遮掩了群星和一輪纖細(xì)的新月，堡頂黑呼呼的，滿是陰影。但從這兒看出去，全城盡在眼簾：紅堡高聳的塔樓和巨大的角堡，下方如迷宮般的城市街道，西面南面是奔流的黑水，東面則是海灣，以及一叢叢煙柱和灰燼，火，到處都是火。近處，士兵擎著火炬，像螞蟻一樣爬滿城墻和從城垛延伸出的塔樓。爛泥門下，飄蕩的煙塵中依稀可辨三座投石機(jī)的輪廓，這是前所未有的巨型投石機(jī)，高過(guò)城墻足足二十尺。但這一切都不能減輕她的恐懼。一陣尖利的刺痛突然襲來(lái)，珊莎緊捂肚子，眼淚奪眶而出。她差點(diǎn)摔下去，幸虧一個(gè)影子突然閃出，用強(qiáng)有力的手緊扣她的胳膊，將她穩(wěn)住。
Turning back to the stair, Sansa climbed. The smoke blotted out the stars and the thin crescent of moon, so the roof was dark and thick with shadows. Yet from here she could see everything: the Red Keep’s tall towers and great cornerforts, the maze of city streets beyond, to south and west the river running black, the bay to the east, the columns of smoke and cinders, and fires, fires everywhere. Soldiers crawled over the city walls like ants with torches, and crowded the hoardings that had sprouted from the ramparts. Down by the Mud Gate, outlined against the drifting smoke, she could make out the vague shape of the three huge catapults, the biggest anyone had ever seen, overtopping the walls by a good twenty feet. Yet none of it made her feel less fearful. A stab went through her, so sharp that Sansa sobbed and clutched at her belly. She might have fallen, but a shadow moved suddenly, and strong fingers grabbed her arm and steadied her.
她倉(cāng)皇地抓向城垛尋求支撐，指頭在粗糙的巖石上亂扒。“放開我，”她大喊?！胺砰_！”
She grabbed a merlon for support, her fingers scrabbling at the rough stone. “Let go of me,” she cried. “Let go.”
“小小鳥認(rèn)為自己真的長(zhǎng)翅膀，是嗎？還是想學(xué)你弟弟一樣當(dāng)瘸子??？”
“The little bird thinks she has wings, does she? Or do you mean to end up crippled like that brother of yours?”
珊莎想掙脫他的抓握?！拔也粫?huì)掉下去。我只是……被你嚇了一跳，如此而已?！?/p>
Sansa twisted in his grasp. “I wasn’t going to fall. It was only … you startled me, that’s all.”
“我嚇著你了？我還是把你嚇著了？”
“You mean I scared you. And still do.”
她深吸一口氣，穩(wěn)定心神。“我以為只有我一個(gè)人，我……”她瞥向別處。
She took a deep breath to calm herself. “I thought I was alone, I …” She glanced away.
“算了吧，小小鳥，你還是不敢正眼看我，對(duì)不對(duì)？”獵狗放開她。“呵呵，當(dāng)你被暴民圍住時(shí)，倒挺高興看見(jiàn)我的臉啊，記得嗎？”
“The little bird still can’t bear to look at me, can she?” The Hound released her. “You were glad enough to see my face when the mob had you, though. Remember?”
這一切，珊莎記得再清楚不過(guò)。她記得他們的吼叫，記得鮮血從石塊砸破的額角沿著臉頰流淌而下，記得那個(gè)想把她從馬上拉下去的男人嘴里噴出的刺鼻蒜味。她仍能感覺(jué)那幾根冷酷的手指鉗著自己手腕，讓她失去平衡，搖搖欲墜。
Sansa remembered all too well. She remembered the way they had howled, the feel of the blood running down her cheek from where the stone had struck her, and the garlic stink on the breath of the man who had tried to pull her from her horse. She could still feel the cruel pinch of fingers on her wrist as she lost her balance and began to fall.
她以為自己就要死去，但那只手忽然一陣抽搐，五根手指一起抽搐，手的主人像馬一樣尖聲嘶叫。胳膊落地，男一只手，另一只更強(qiáng)壯的手將她推回馬鞍。大蒜氣味的男人倒在地上，手臂斷處血流如注，但周圍還有許多人，有的甚至手拿棍棒。獵狗策馬相迎，長(zhǎng)劍舞成一片鋼鐵幻影，所經(jīng)之處血肉橫飛，人們四散奔逃。他所向披靡，仰天長(zhǎng)笑，那張燒傷的可怕臉龐似乎頃刻間變了形。
She’d thought she was going to die then, but the fingers had twitched, all five at once, and the man had shrieked loud as a horse. When his hand fell away, another hand, stronger, shoved her back into her saddle. The man with the garlicky breath was on the ground, blood pumping out the stump of his arm, but there were others all around, some with clubs in hand. The Hound leapt at them, his sword a blur of steel that trailed a red mist as it swung. When they broke and ran before him he had laughed, his terrible burned face for a moment transformed.
而今，她逼自己再度正視那張臉龐，真正地看。這是禮貌，貴婦人必須隨時(shí)隨地都要記得有禮貌。其實(shí)最可怕的不是那些瘡疤，甚至不是他嘴唇抽搐的模樣，最可怕的是他那雙眼睛。她從沒(méi)見(jiàn)過(guò)如此一雙充滿怒火的眼睛?！拔摇蚁胛沂潞笤撊フ夷悖彼掏掏峦碌卣f(shuō)，“當(dāng)面向你道謝，因……因?yàn)槟憔攘宋业拿阏嬗赂??！?/p>
She made herself look at that face now, really look. It was only courteous, and a lady must never forget her courtesies. The scars are not the worst part, nor even the way his mouth twitches. It’s his eyes. She had never seen eyes so full of anger. “I … I should have come to you after,” she said haltingly. “To thank you, for … for saving me … you were so brave.”
“勇敢？”他的笑聲好似咆哮。“狗追老鼠有何勇氣可言？他們?nèi)畟€(gè)對(duì)我一個(gè)，卻無(wú)一人敢直視我的眼睛?！?/p>
“Brave?” His laugh was half a snarl. “A dog doesn’t need courage to chase off rats. They had me thirty to one, and not a man of them dared face me.”
她討厭他說(shuō)話的方式，總是那么刺耳，那么怒氣沖沖?！澳阌X(jué)得嚇唬老百姓很令你愉快嗎？”
She hated the way he talked, always so harsh and angry. “Does it give you joy to scare people?”
“不，殺人才讓我愉快?！彼淖彀驮俣瘸榇??！澳銗?ài)怎么皺臉都行，但在我面前，不要故作虔誠(chéng)。你出身世家，可別告訴我艾德·史塔克公爵從沒(méi)殺過(guò)人?。俊?/p>
“No, it gives me joy to kill people.” His mouth twitched. “Wrinkle up your face all you like, but spare me this false piety. You were a high lord’s get. Don’t tell me Lord Eddard Stark of Winterfell never killed a man.”
“他只是履行責(zé)任，沒(méi)有喜歡過(guò)。”
“That was his duty. He never liked it.”
“他這么告訴你？”克里岡再次大笑?！翱磥?lái)你父親不是個(gè)騙子便是個(gè)傻瓜。殺戮才是世上最美好的事。”他拔出長(zhǎng)劍。“這就是真實(shí)。想必你尊貴的父親大人在貝勒大圣堂前深有體會(huì)。瞧啊，臨冬城公爵，國(guó)王之手，北境守護(hù)，了不得的艾德。史塔克，傳承八千年之久的血脈……卻被伊林·派恩一劍斬首，不是嗎？你記不記得，當(dāng)人頭落地時(shí)，他的軀體還手舞足蹈地痙攣？”
“Is that what he told you?” Clegane laughed again. “Your father lied. Killing is the sweetest thing there is.” He drew his longsword. “Here’s your truth. Your precious father found that out on Baelor’s steps. Lord of Winterfell, Hand of the King, Warden of the North, the mighty Eddard Stark, of a line eight thousand years old … but Ilyn Payne’s blade went through his neck all the same, didn’t it? Do you remember the dance he did when his head came off his shoulders?”
珊莎突然感到一陣寒意，于是抱住自己?！澳銥楹慰傔@么討厭？我是在感謝你……”
Sansa hugged herself, suddenly cold. “Why are you always so hateful? I was thanking you …”
“沒(méi)錯(cuò)，你把我當(dāng)作那些你喜歡的‘真正的騎士’。算了吧，小妹妹，你以為騎士有什么用？成天穿著黃金鎧甲，一心博取女士歡心？我告訴你，騎士惟一的用處就是生來(lái)被我殺?！彼麑㈤L(zhǎng)劍鋒刃抵住她脖子，就在耳朵下面，她可以感覺(jué)它的鋒利。“我從十二歲時(shí)開始?xì)⑷?，至今刀下之鬼已?shù)不勝數(shù)。不論歷史悠久的世家豪門，一身天鵝絨的肥佬富翁，趾高氣昂的貴族騎士，是的，還有女人和小孩——人為魚肉，我為刀俎。他們盡可以占有土地，神靈和金錢！他們盡可以彼此高呼‘爵士’！”桑鐸·克里岡朝她腳邊啐了一口，以示不屑?！拔抑灰@個(gè)，”他邊說(shuō)邊把劍從她咽喉舉起，“有了它，世上我什么都不怕?！?/p>
“Just as if I was one of those true knights you love so well, yes. What do you think a knight is for, girl? You think it’s all taking favors from ladies and looking fine in gold plate? Knights are for killing.” He laid the edge of his longsword against her neck, just under her ear. Sansa could feel the sharpness of the steel. “I killed my first man at twelve. I’ve lost count of how many I’ve killed since then. High lords with old names, fat rich men dressed in velvet, knights puffed up like bladders with their honors, yes, and women and children too—they’re all meat, and I’m the butcher. Let them have their lands and their gods and their gold. Let them have their sers.” Sandor Clegane spat at her feet to show what he thought of that. “So long as I have this,” he said, lifting the sword from her throat, “there’s no man on earth I need fear.”
除了你哥哥，珊莎心想，但她控制情緒，沒(méi)說(shuō)出口?？磥?lái)，他正如他自己所說(shuō)，真是一條狗，一條壞脾氣的瘋狗，誰(shuí)想摸他反而被咬，誰(shuí)想傷他主人他也和誰(shuí)拼命?！昂訉?duì)岸那些人你也不怕？”
Except your brother, Sansa thought, but she had better sense than to say it aloud. He is a dog, just as he says. A half-wild, mean-tempered dog that bites any hand that tries to pet him, and yet will savage any man who tries to hurt his masters. “Not even the men across the river?”
克里岡轉(zhuǎn)頭望向遠(yuǎn)處的火焰。“火，”他還劍入鞘。“火是懦夫的武器?！?/p>
Clegane’s eyes turned toward the distant fires. “All this burning.” He sheathed his sword. “Only cowards fight with fire.”
“史坦尼斯公爵不是懦夫?！?/p>
“Lord Stannis is no coward.”
“但也沒(méi)他哥哥的氣概。區(qū)區(qū)一條小河，難不倒勞勃?！?/p>
“He’s not the man his brother was either. Robert never let a little thing like a river stop him.”
“他要是過(guò)了河，你怎么辦？”
“What will you do when he crosses?”
“戰(zhàn)斗。殺人。也許被殺。”
“Fight. Kill. Die, maybe.”
“你不害怕嗎？你犯下這么多罪孽，人死以后，也許會(huì)被諸神罰下七層地獄呢。”
“Aren’t you afraid? The gods might send you down to some terrible hell for all the evil you’ve done.”
“罪孽何在？”他大笑，“諸神何在？”
“What evil?” He laughed. “What gods?”
“諸神創(chuàng)造了我們所有人呀?！?/p>
“The gods who made us all.”
“所有人？”他嘲諷地笑道?！澳悄愀嬖V我，小小鳥，什么樣的神會(huì)創(chuàng)造出小惡魔那樣的怪物？什么樣的神會(huì)容忍坦妲伯爵夫人的女兒那樣的弱智？如果這世上真有神靈存在，他們只是創(chuàng)造綿羊好讓狼不挨餓，創(chuàng)造弱者來(lái)給強(qiáng)者愚弄?！?/p>
“All?” he mocked. “Tell me, little bird, what kind of god makes a monster like the Imp, or a halfwit like Lady Tanda’s daughter? If there are gods, they made sheep so wolves could eat mutton, and they made the weak for the strong to play with.”
“真正的騎士會(huì)保護(hù)弱者?！?/p>
“True knights protect the weak.”
他嗤之以鼻?！罢嬲尿T士和諸神一樣，都不存在，活在人間，倘若無(wú)法自衛(wèi)，就是死路一條，必須為別人讓道。刀劍和強(qiáng)權(quán)統(tǒng)治著這個(gè)世界，千萬(wàn)別相信旁的說(shuō)法?！?/p>
He snorted. “There are no true knights, no more than there are gods. If you can’t protect yourself, die and get out of the way of those who can. Sharp steel and strong arms rule this world, don’t ever believe any different.”
珊莎從他身邊踉蹌退開?！澳愫每植?！”
Sansa backed away from him. “You’re awful.”
“我很誠(chéng)實(shí)，恐怖的是這個(gè)世界。好了，快飛吧，小小鳥，你不敢面對(duì)我，我則受不了你的偷看?！?/p>
“I’m honest. It’s the world that’s awful. Now fly away, little bird, I’m sick of you peeping at me.”
她一聲不吭地跑開。她害怕桑鐸·克里岡……然而，她心中又忍不住希望唐托斯爵士有一點(diǎn)點(diǎn)獵狗的桀驁。諸神是存在的，她告訴自己，真正的騎士也存在。所有的故事都不是謊言。
Wordless, she fled. She was afraid of Sandor Clegane … and yet, some part of her wished that Ser Dontos had a little of the Hound’s ferocity. There are gods, she told herself, and there are true knights too. All the stories can’t be lies.
當(dāng)晚，珊莎又夢(mèng)到了暴動(dòng)。暴民們朝她蜂擁而來(lái)，大聲尖叫，像一頭瘋狂的千面野獸。不管她轉(zhuǎn)向何方，眼前都是一張張扭曲的臉孔，仿佛戴著兇殘的怪獸面具。她哭著告訴他們，告訴他們自己是個(gè)乖女孩，但他們還是照樣將她從馬上拉下來(lái)?！安?，”她高喊，“不，求求你們，請(qǐng)不要，不要??！”沒(méi)人理會(huì)。她大聲呼喚唐托斯爵士，呼喚她的兄弟，呼喚死去的父親和冰原狼，呼喚那曾獻(xiàn)給她一朵紅玫瑰的英勇的洛拉斯爵士，但無(wú)人前來(lái)救她。她呼喚歌謠中的英雄，呼喚傻子佛羅理安、萊安·雷德溫爵士以及龍騎士伊蒙王子，但他們都聽(tīng)不見(jiàn)。女人們像黃鼠狼一樣涌上前，把她圍住，掐她的腿，踢她肚子，還有人打她的臉，牙齒碎裂開來(lái)。然后是鋼鐵閃耀的光芒，匕首刺進(jìn)肚腹，一刀一刀又一刀，直到她整個(gè)人支離破碎，只剩絲絲潮濕閃亮的肉片。
That night Sansa dreamed of the riot again. The mob surged around her, shrieking, a maddened beast with a thousand faces. Everywhere she turned she saw faces twisted into monstrous inhuman masks. She wept and told them she had never done them hurt, yet they dragged her from her horse all the same. “No,” she cried, “no, please, don’t, don’t,” but no one paid her any heed. She shouted for Ser Dontos, for her brothers, for her dead father and her dead wolf, for gallant Ser Loras who had given her a red rose once, but none of them came. She called for the heroes from the songs, for Florian and Ser Ryam Redwyne and Prince Aemon the Dragonknight, but no one heard. Women swarmed over her like weasels, pinching her legs and kicking her in the belly, and someone hit her in the face and she felt her teeth shatter. Then she saw the bright glimmer of steel. The knife plunged into her belly and tore and tore and tore, until there was nothing left of her down there but shiny wet ribbons.
她醒了。蒼白的晨光斜射進(jìn)窗，但她只感到惡心疼痛，好像一夜沒(méi)睡似的。雙股之間有些黏黏的東西，掀開毯子一看，原來(lái)是血。一時(shí)之間，她只想到噩夢(mèng)成真。她還記得刀子在體內(nèi)扭轉(zhuǎn)撕割的滋味。于是她恐懼地挪動(dòng)，想踢床單卻滾到了地上，赤裸身子，喘著粗氣，下體流血，滿心恐懼。
When she woke, the pale light of morning was slanting through her window, yet she felt as sick and achy as if she had not slept at all. There was something sticky on her thighs. When she threw back the blanket and saw the blood, all she could think was that her dream had somehow come true. She remembered the knives inside her, twisting and ripping. She squirmed away in horror, kicking at the sheets and falling to the floor, breathing raggedly, naked, bloodied, and afraid.
但當(dāng)她趴著蜷在地上，忽然明白了過(guò)來(lái)?！安灰f(wàn)不要，”珊莎嗚咽著，“求求你，千萬(wàn)不要啊?！彼灰约喊l(fā)生這種變化，不是現(xiàn)在，不是在這里，不是現(xiàn)在，不是現(xiàn)在，不是現(xiàn)在，不是現(xiàn)在！
But as she crouched there, on her hands and knees, understanding came. “No, please,” Sansa whimpered, “please, no.” She didn’t want this happening to her, not now, not here, not now, not now, not now, not now.
瘋狂攫住了她，她撐著床柱站起身，走到水盆邊清洗大腿，擦掉那些黏黏的東西。腿是清干凈了，水卻成了粉紅。女侍一進(jìn)門就會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)。然后她想到床單，于是沖回床邊，驚恐地瞪著那灘暗紅污漬，她所有的秘密就清楚明白地?cái)[在那里。怎么辦？怎么辦？必須搶在別人看見(jiàn)之前處理掉，否則就晚了。她不要被逼著跟喬佛里結(jié)婚，她不要跟他睡在一起啊！
Madness took hold of her. Pulling herself up by the bedpost, she went to the basin and washed between her legs, scrubbing away all the stickiness. By the time she was done, the water was pink with blood. When her maidservants saw it they would know. Then she remembered the bedclothes. She rushed back to the bed and stared in horror at the dark red stain and the tale it told. All she could think was that she had to get rid of it, or else they’d see. She couldn’t let them see, or they’d marry her to Joffrey and make her lay with him.
珊莎抓起匕首，切割床單，把污漬挖下來(lái)。她們問(wèn)起這個(gè)洞，我要怎么說(shuō)呢？熱淚從臉上滾落。她將撕破的床單扯下，發(fā)現(xiàn)毯子上也有血。我把它們?nèi)珶?。她將證物聚成一團(tuán)，塞進(jìn)壁爐，用床邊油燈里的油潤(rùn)濕后，點(diǎn)火焚燒。然后她意識(shí)到血早就一路透過(guò)床單滲進(jìn)羽毛床墊，因此她把床墊也抱來(lái)。它又大又重，很難移動(dòng)，珊莎費(fèi)盡全力，才塞了一半進(jìn)火里。正當(dāng)她雙膝跪地，拼命將床墊往火焰里推，濃密的灰煙在四周旋轉(zhuǎn)，充溢房間的時(shí)候，門猛然打開，她聽(tīng)見(jiàn)女侍倒抽一口氣。
Snatching up her knife, Sansa hacked at the sheet, cutting out the stain. If they ask me about the hole, what will I say? Tears ran down her face. She pulled the torn sheet from the bed, and the stained blanket as well. I’ll have to burn them. She balled up the evidence, stuffed it in the fireplace, drenched it in oil from her bedside lamp, and lit it afire. Then she realized that the blood had soaked through the sheet into the featherbed, so she bundled that up as well, but it was big and cumbersome, hard to move. Sansa could get only half of it into the fire. She was on her knees, struggling to shove the mattress into the flames as thick grey smoke eddied around her and filled the room, when the door burst open and she heard her maid gasp.
最后，三人合力才將她拖開。之前的一切都白費(fèi)工夫。床單雖已焚毀，但當(dāng)她被架開時(shí)，兩條大腿又是血跡斑斑。她仿佛用身軀向全世界展開一面蘭尼斯特家族的緋紅旗幟，明目昭彰地將自己出賣給了喬佛里。
In the end it took three of them to pull her away. And it was all for nothing. The bedclothes were burnt, but by the time they carried her off her thighs were bloody again. It was as if her own body had betrayed her to Joffrey, unfurling a banner of Lannister crimson for all the world to see.
火被撲滅以后，她們抬走焦黑的羽毛床墊，驅(qū)散屋內(nèi)煙塵，然后拿來(lái)浴盆。女人們進(jìn)進(jìn)出出，低聲細(xì)語(yǔ)，都用奇怪的目光看著她。她們將浴盆注滿滾燙的熱水，替她沐浴沖頭，還給她一塊布裹在兩腿中間。此時(shí)珊莎已經(jīng)冷靜下來(lái)，不禁為自己的愚行感到羞傀。濃煙把大部分衣服都?xì)Я?。有個(gè)女人出去帶回一件綠色羊毛連衣裙，大小基本合身?！斑@不如您自己的東西漂亮，但只好湊合著用，”她一邊說(shuō)一邊將它從珊莎頭上套下。“您的鞋還完好，您至少不用光腳去見(jiàn)太后?！?/p>
When the fire was out, they carried off the singed featherbed, fanned away the worst of the smoke, and brought up a tub. Women came and went, muttering and looking at her strangely. They filled the tub with scalding hot water, bathed her and washed her hair and gave her a cloth to wear between her legs. By then Sansa was calm again, and ashamed for her folly. The smoke had ruined most of her clothing. One of the women went away and came back with a green wool shift that was almost her size. “It’s not as pretty as your own things, but it will serve,” she announced when she’d pulled it down over Sansa’s head. “Your shoes weren’t burned, so at least you won’t need to go barefoot to the queen.”
珊莎被帶進(jìn)瑟曦·蘭尼斯特的書房時(shí)，她正在吃早餐?！白?，”太后和藹地說(shuō)，“餓不餓？”她指指桌上，有粥，蜂蜜，牛奶，白煮蛋和脆皮炸魚。
Cersei Lannister was breaking her fast when Sansa was ushered into her solar. “You may sit,” the queen said graciously. “Are you hungry?” She gestured at the table. There was porridge, honey, milk, boiled eggs, and crisp fried fish.
她一見(jiàn)食物就想吐，好似腸胃打了結(jié)。“我不餓，謝謝您，陛下。”
The sight of the food made Sansa feel ill. Her tummy was tied in a knot. “No, thank you, Your Grace.”
“哼，咱們的提利昂和史坦尼斯公爵鬧得每樣食物都有灰燼的味道。不過(guò)你也放起火來(lái)了，想做什么呀？”
“I don’t blame you. Between Tyrion and Lord Stannis, everything I eat tastes of ash. And now you’re setting fires as well. What did you hope to accomplish?”
珊莎低頭，“血把我嚇壞了?！?/p>
Sansa lowered her head. “The blood frightened me.”
“血是你成為女人的標(biāo)志。凱特琳夫人應(yīng)該早告訴過(guò)你作好心理準(zhǔn)備。你的初潮到來(lái)，僅此而已?！?/p>
“The blood is the seal of your womanhood. Lady Catelyn might have prepared you. You’ve had your first flowering, no more.”
珊莎從沒(méi)感覺(jué)如此語(yǔ)窮詞短?！澳赣H大人是告誡過(guò)我，可我……我以為不是這樣?！?/p>
Sansa had never felt less flowery. “My lady mother told me, but I … I thought it would be different.”
“那是怎樣？”
“Different how?”
“我不知道。應(yīng)該不會(huì)這么……臟亂，應(yīng)該比較神奇。”
“I don’t know. Less … less messy, and more magical.”
瑟曦太后忍俊不禁?！暗壬鷤€(gè)孩子，珊莎，你就明白了。女人的生命九分臟亂，一分神奇，你很快就會(huì)知道……而表面上神奇的部分往往最為臟亂?！彼ㄒ豢谂Ｄ?。“那么，你現(xiàn)在是女人了，有沒(méi)有一點(diǎn)概念，知道這意味著什么？”
Queen Cersei laughed. “Wait until you birth a child, Sansa. A woman’s life is nine parts mess to one part magic, you’ll learn that soon enough … and the parts that look like magic often turn out to be messiest of all.” She took a sip of milk. “So now you are a woman. Do you have the least idea of what that means?”
“意味著我已適合同房共枕，”珊莎說(shuō)，“并為國(guó)王懷孩子?！?/p>
“It means that I am now fit to be wedded and bedded,” said Sansa, “and to bear children for the king.”
太后苦笑，“你已不像從前那樣期盼這個(gè)了，我看得出來(lái)，也不會(huì)怪你。喬佛里向來(lái)不太聽(tīng)話，甚至連他出生……我整整辛苦了一天半才把他生出來(lái)。你無(wú)法想像那種疼痛，珊莎，我的尖叫聲如此之大，想必勞勃在御林里都能聽(tīng)見(jiàn)?！?/p>
The queen gave a wry smile. “A prospect that no longer entices you as it once did, I can see. I will not fault you for that. Joffrey has always been difficult. Even his birth … I labored a day and a half to bring him forth. You cannot imagine the pain, Sansa. I screamed so loudly that I fancied Robert might hear me in the kingswood.”
“國(guó)王陛下沒(méi)陪在您身邊？”
“His Grace was not with you?”
“勞勃？勞勃在打獵。這是慣例，每當(dāng)我產(chǎn)期一近，我的王夫便帶著獵人和狗逃進(jìn)森林?；貋?lái)的時(shí)候，他送我一堆毛皮或一只鹿頭，我則給他一個(gè)孩子?！?/p>
“Robert? Robert was hunting. That was his custom. Whenever my time was near, my royal husband would flee to the trees with his huntsmen and hounds. When he returned he would present me with some pelts or a stag’s head, and I would present him with a baby.
“我提醒你，我可不想他留下。我有派席爾大學(xué)士和足以組成一支軍團(tuán)的助產(chǎn)婦，以及我弟弟。他們不讓詹姆進(jìn)產(chǎn)房，他笑問(wèn)：誰(shuí)敢攔他？”
“Not that I wanted him to stay, mind you. I had Grand Maester Pycelle and an army of midwives, and I had my brother. When they told Jaime he was not allowed in the birthing room, he smiled and asked which of them proposed to keep him out.
“喬佛里恐怕就不會(huì)這么愛(ài)你了。這你該去感謝你妹妹——如果她還沒(méi)死的話。他永不會(huì)忘記在三叉戟河畔她是如何當(dāng)你的面羞辱他，他會(huì)羞辱你作為報(bào)復(fù)。不過(guò)，你比外表看上去要堅(jiān)強(qiáng)，估計(jì)能挺住一點(diǎn)點(diǎn)的羞恥。瞧，我不就挺過(guò)來(lái)了嗎？你也許永遠(yuǎn)不會(huì)愛(ài)上國(guó)王，但你會(huì)愛(ài)著他的孩子?！?/p>
“Joffrey will show you no such devotion, I fear. You could thank your sister for that, if she weren’t dead. He’s never been able to forget that day on the Trident when you saw her shame him, so he shames you in turn. You’re stronger than you seem, though. I expect you’ll survive a bit of humiliation. I did. You may never love the king, but you’ll love his children.”
“我全心全意地愛(ài)著國(guó)王陛下，”珊莎說(shuō)。
“I love His Grace with all my heart,” Sansa said.
太后嘆口氣?！澳阕詈枚鄬W(xué)點(diǎn)謊話，而且要快。史坦尼斯大人不會(huì)喜歡這一句，我向你保證?！?/p>
The queen sighed. “You had best learn some new lies, and quickly. Lord Stannis will not like that one, I promise you.”
“新任總主教說(shuō)，諸神反對(duì)史坦尼斯公爵，因?yàn)閱谭鹄锊攀钦嬲膰?guó)王?！?/p>
“The new High Septon said that the gods will never permit Lord Stannis to win, since Joffrey is the rightful king.”
一絲奇特的微笑閃過(guò)太后臉龐，“他是勞勃的嫡子和繼承人，但勞勃每次抱起他，他都會(huì)大哭，令國(guó)王陛下很不喜歡。他那群雜種不但總開心地對(duì)他咯咯傻笑，當(dāng)他把手指放進(jìn)那些低賤的小嘴時(shí)，他們還會(huì)高興地吮吸。勞勃向來(lái)渴望歡樂(lè)和笑顏，他總是如此，哪里能找到這些他就去哪里，所以去找了他的朋友和他的婊子。勞勃想要被愛(ài)。我弟弟提利昂也有同樣的毛病。你想被愛(ài)嗎，珊莎？”
A half smile flickered across the queen’s face. “Robert’s trueborn son and heir. Though Joff would cry whenever Robert picked him up. His Grace did not like that. His bastards had always gurgled at him happily, and sucked his finger when he put it in their little baseborn mouths. Robert wanted smiles and cheers, always, so he went where he found them, to his friends and his whores. Robert wanted to be loved. My brother Tyrion has the same disease. Do you want to be loved, Sansa?”
“每個(gè)人都想被愛(ài)啊?！?/p>
“Everyone wants to be loved.”
“看來(lái)初潮也沒(méi)讓你變聰明，”瑟曦道?！吧荷菸以谶@個(gè)特殊的日子里跟你分享一點(diǎn)做女人的智慧。愛(ài)是毒藥，雖然甜蜜，但依舊能殺人?！?/p>
“I see flowering hasn’t made you any brighter,” said Cersei. “Sansa, permit me to share a bit of womanly wisdom with you on this very special day. Love is poison. A sweet poison, yes, but it will kill you all the same.”
