最近在讀《心理學(xué)與生活》，書中給出了主動(dòng)構(gòu)建幸福人生的 9 條建議，有些地方讀起來不是很通順，有點(diǎn)機(jī)翻的感覺，就找來了英文原版重新翻譯了下。
為了更好地理解，可能不是百分百還原，建議搭配英文原文對(duì)照著看。
一
永遠(yuǎn)不要說自己的壞話。把不開心的原因，歸結(jié)到未來可以改變的事情上。無論對(duì)自己還是他人，都只給建設(shè)性的批評(píng)——下次如何做得更好？
Never say bad things about yourself. Look for sources of your unhappiness in elements that can be modified by future actions. Give yourself and others only constructive criticism—what can be done differently next time to get what you want?
二
將自己的反應(yīng)、想法和感受與朋友、同事、家人等進(jìn)行比較，以此來判斷自己的反應(yīng)是否恰當(dāng)、是否符合正常的社會(huì)標(biāo)準(zhǔn)。
Compare your reactions, thoughts, and feelings with those of friends, coworkers, family members, and others so that you can gauge the appropriateness and relevance of your responses against a suitable social norm.
三
擁有幾個(gè)可以分享感受、快樂和煩惱的親密朋友。努力發(fā)展、維護(hù)并擴(kuò)展你的社會(huì)支持網(wǎng)絡(luò)。
Have several close friends with whom you can share feelings, joys, and worries. Work at developing, maintaining, and expanding your social support networks.
四
培養(yǎng)一種平衡的時(shí)間觀念，能夠根據(jù)任務(wù)的要求、所處情境和自身需要，靈活地調(diào)整關(guān)注焦點(diǎn)：有要完成的工作時(shí)展望未來，目標(biāo)達(dá)成、快樂在手時(shí)享受當(dāng)下，回望過去以保持初心。
Develop a sense of balanced time perspective in which you can flexibly focus on the demands of the task, the situation, and your needs; be future-oriented when there is work to be done, present-oriented when the goal is achieved and pleasure is at hand, and past-oriented to keep you in touch with your roots.
五
始終充分認(rèn)可自己的成功和快樂（并與他人分享你的積極感受）。記錄所有讓你與眾不同，并且能提供給他人的品質(zhì)。例如，一個(gè)害羞的人可以給健談的人提供專注的傾聽。了解你個(gè)人力量的來源以及可用的應(yīng)對(duì)資源。
Always take full credit for your successes and happiness (and share your positive feelings with other people). Keep an inventory of all the qualities that make you special and unique—those qualities you can offer others. For example, a shy person can provide a talkative person with the gift of attentive listening. Know your sources of personal strength and available coping resources.
六
當(dāng)你感到情緒失控時(shí)，可以通過以下方式將自己拉出這個(gè)情景：直接離開，站在情景或沖突中的另一個(gè)人的角度思考，從未來的視角來看現(xiàn)在這個(gè)看似無法承受的問題，或者找一個(gè)富有同情心的人傾訴。要允許自己去感受和表達(dá)情緒。
When you feel you are losing control over your emotions, distance yourself from the situation by physically leaving it, role-playing the position of another person in the situation or conflict, projecting your imagination into the future to gain perspective on what seems an overwhelming problem now, or talking to a sympathetic listener. Allow yourself to feel and express your emotions.
七
有時(shí)失敗和失望反而是好事。它們可能告訴你目標(biāo)不適合你，或讓你免于日后更大的失望。從每次失敗中學(xué)習(xí)。坦然承認(rèn)挫折，然后繼續(xù)前進(jìn)。每一次意外、不幸或期望落空，都可能藏著意想不到的機(jī)會(huì)。
Remember that failure and disappointment are sometimes blessings in disguise. They may tell you that your goals are not right for you or may save you from bigger letdowns later on. Learn from every failure. Acknowledge setbacks by saying, “I made a mistake,” and move on. Every accident, misfortune, or violation of your expectations is potentially a wonderful opportunity in disguise.
八
如果你發(fā)現(xiàn)無法幫助自己或處于困境中的他人，請(qǐng)尋求學(xué)校健康中心或社區(qū)專業(yè)人士的幫助。有些情況下，看似是心理問題可能實(shí)際是生理問題，反之亦然。提前了解身邊的心理健康服務(wù)，使用時(shí)不要擔(dān)心被污名化。
If you discover you cannot help yourself or another person in distress, seek the counsel of a trained specialist in your student health department or community. In some cases, a problem that appears to be psychological may really be physical, and vice versa. Check out your student mental health services before you need them and use them without concern about being stigmatized.
九
培養(yǎng)健康的樂趣。抽出時(shí)間來放松、冥想、做按摩、放風(fēng)箏，享受你可以獨(dú)自完成的愛好和活動(dòng)，這些活動(dòng)能幫助你更好地認(rèn)識(shí)自己、欣賞自己。
Cultivate healthy pleasures. Take time out to relax, to meditate, to get a massage, to fly a kite, and to enjoy hobbies and activities you can do alone and that help you get in touch with and better appreciate yourself.
